Have you ever wondered whether you’re headed in the right direction in pursuing a dream, goal or project? Perhaps, you started on the journey towards that dream or goal with much enthusiasm, but along the way you experienced obstacles including, fear and self-doubt.
Carry On Friends was started last September to provide a space to discuss the Caribbean American perspectives on life and culture through stories, experiences & lessons. A place where by sharing everyday stories about life and how we transition to the different stages of life and responsibilities, you will find content that informs, empowers and entertains you.
There have been challenges in pursuing this dream; where being the main contributor to a blog there are time constraints and there’s a lot work for one person. I started to have doubts because it seemed that things aren’t going forward as I’d hoped. I started to wonder whether I was going in the right direction with COF. I still continued to post but not as frequently as I would’ve liked.
Then a light came in the form of an event on March 22, 2014 called “Ladies Who Brunch” hosted by Stacey Bethel, Editor-In-Chief of Triple The Focus Magazine. It was a wonderful experience to be in a room filled with successful ladies in a variety of industries. The ladies where in different stages of pursuing a dream of theirs – some where still thinking about it, while others just started and others had been doing it for a while.
At the end of the brunch we pledged to support each other in our respective endeavors. Here was an open invitation to let these ladies know what I needed help with, yet still after the brunch I still hadn’t said a word to any of the ladies about COF. I told myself that I need to prepare for a presentation – yes it sounds silly that I felt I needed a presentation to talk about the blog; but I knew this was me procrastinating due to doubt.
A few days later on March 29th, I was reminded, why Carry On Friends was started when I attended Caribbean Digital Divas hosted by Style & Vibes. The panelists included Syn Dawkins, Jay Blessed, Amy Theard, Tabitha St. Bernard and Nikki Z who shared their journeys to success offering personal and relatable stories. When asked about hurdles in pursuing a dream, the ladies cited traditional obstacles, self-doubt, heartache and discontent however they quickly acknowledged that these hurdles also help propelled them to where they are today.
As each of the ladies began to tell their stories they realized how much they and by extension we all have in common with each other. Their stories resonated with me as I still continued to doubt the purpose of COF and my vision for it. Thanks to this panel in a few short hours I regained my confidence and I started to feel that I was on the right track. These are the stories that need to be told, the stories that women who are at different stages of their own journeys need to hear.
Closing out the night’s discussion the ladies shared bright visions of the future and in their aspirations attendees found hope, well I can only speak for myself.
As with most of us, I am my worst critic and self-doubt has often times cause me to procrastinate and not go full steam ahead in pursuing my dreams or goals. I reached out to a friend to discuss Carry On Friends and to seek her advice but somewhere along the line, doubt and fear kicked in and I’ve yet to have that conversation with her. It’s not that I’m afraid of her feedback, but I’ve realized that I am fear of failure.
I had a discussion recently with my brother about an article he wrote that quoted Will Smith in his movie After Earth,”fear isn’t real, it’s a choice”. It is human nature to experience fear and the “realness” of that fear is relative to the person experiencing the fear. This past Saturday I saw this tweet from John Maxwell quoting Les Brown.
Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears. –Les Brown
— John C Maxwell (@JohnCMaxwell) April 12, 2014
I am not fooled, things will not be easy, there will be setbacks and yes sometimes fear, nonetheless, I am excited about the future.
If we want to live our dreams, we must give up our conscious & unconscious fears about our dream, if we don’t we will only live our fears!LB
— Les Brown (@MRLESBROWN) August 30, 2009
Whatever your pursuit, go and pursue it. It will be challenging at times but you must preserve through your fears, self-doubt and procrastination and keep moving forward. At the right time, God will give you the signs you need, to encouraged you and to let you know that you’re going in the right direction.
Feed your Faith and let your Fears Starve to Death! LB
— Les Brown (@MRLESBROWN) July 27, 2009